Next it's a jumble

The timeline for the next events become a jumble...

We flew home from the conference and my mom came to us too. We got the bassinet ready and all of the stuff for our daughter, who was to be named Kathryn Mary.

Over the next couple of days we learned more about the birth mom... she was 22 and had hid the pregnancy from her family. They eventually found out as she ended up in the hospital longer than expected. They were trying to convince her to keep the baby but she did not want to.

Finally the call came to meet the social worker at the hospital. We were so excited.... my partner, my mom and I got in the car, complete with new car seat and headed off to the hospital. We had to wait outside because it was hospital policy not to do adoption "hand-offs" in the facility. So we got there and waited......

and waited.....

In my head I started thinking that this could not be good... but he would have called, right?

An hour later the social worker came outside empty handed. She had decided she might not want to give the baby up.

We were crushed...... two years later this still brings tears to my eyes. It's the first time I have put this step by step into words. We got back in the car and cried the whole way home. My mom flew back home that night and we tried to pick up.

A few days later the phone rang again to tell us that the birth mother had changed her mind and was ready to give up her baby girl for adoption.

What should we do?